


Promise

by SugarCrystal



Category: Red Dwarf
Genre: Angst, M/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-01
Updated: 2018-02-01
Packaged: 2019-03-12 02:44:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13538007
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SugarCrystal/pseuds/SugarCrystal
Summary: Tearjerker, basically. Or at least, it's supposed to be, if I've written it right.





	Promise

The first time Rimmer got to hold Lister was when Kochanski dumped him. Lister, deeply unhappy and somewhat drunk, just collapsed face down at the table in their quarters and sobbed into his arms until Rimmer sat down next to him and patted him on the shoulder. The next thing he knew, Lister was crying on _him_ and Rimmer slid his arms around him and held him tight and stroked his hair while a damp patch formed on his shirt from Lister's tears. At one point, Rimmer even daringly pressed a light kiss to Lister's temple, half afraid of an angry reaction, but Lister didn't even seem to notice.

He wanted more, so much more. He wanted to kiss him properly, lips and tongues together. To kiss away his tears and his pain and make him smile again and then lie him down in the bunk and make love to him until he forgot all about Kochanski, until he could only think about Rimmer. But that would never happen, _could_ never happen. Hugging Lister was the most Rimmer could ever have.

_Savour this_ , Rimmer told himself over and over, _savour it_. Because it was all he'd get. Once Lister had recovered and sobered up, he would find the whole thing an embarrassment and he would never let Rimmer hold him like this again. Ever.

He was wrong.

The second time Rimmer got to hold Lister was on a day that would have been Lister's gran's birthday. Lister celebrated by having a few drinks to her memory and reminiscing about the crazy old lady, her attitude to life, her disputes with the neighbours and her home recipes. Which led to reminiscing about Liverpool and England and Earth in general until he got homesick and, somewhat the worse for drink, crawled into Rimmer's bunk as Rimmer was trying to sleep and asked for a hug. Rimmer tentatively put his arms around him while Lister lay with his head resting on Rimmer's chest. Before long, Lister was sound asleep and Rimmer lay still in the dark, holding him and just pretending..., pretending for a brief moment that he and Lister...,

He gently kissed him on top of the head. "I love you," he said quietly. "I love you, Listy, and I know you don't love me and never will and that's why I'm not going to tell you. But I will always be there to look out for you and protect you, I promise."

Of course, Lister didn't hear, as Rimmer intended. But Holly did and three million years later when he realised it was time to release Lister from stasis and he would have to resurrect a crew member as a hologram to look after him and keep him sane, he remembered.


End file.
